Wednesday, July 4, 2018

I need help, what's wrong with me?

I'm 16 and for about 3 years of my life I've believed that my teachers at school are able to hack into my brain and watch everything that I do. I try to tell myself this isn't real but everytime I do something else tells me it is. The only way I can stop them seeing things is if I hold my thumb over my front camera on my iPhone. I don't know why this started but I'll tell you some more mental info about me. I've been self harming for 3 years so I wonder if anything has started from that and I also have anxiety and struggle to form relationships with people, although I do find myself getting increasingly obsessed with people, but nothing sexual or romantic at all! I'm freaking out over this all now as it is becoming far to much for me to handle. When I'm obsessed I go out of my way just to see them, which might sound stalkerish but I don't mean it like that I just don't know how to rephrase it. I want this to stop and I want my teachers to 'get out my brain' but I have no idea how and I don't know what to do anymore. Please don't think I'm a freak for this, no one knows any of this and anyone who I've been 'obsessed' with has never known anything about it as I act completely normal around them so no one can suspect anything this is just a very private but real struggle. Any help would be appreciated:/

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